Thursday, December 17, 2009

Unbelievable Lyrics

Lets talk about Christmas songs for a minute. I love Christmas songs. I always wait until after Thanksgiving (Prince Charming insists on that rule or I would totally be listening to them earlier), but from two days after Thanksgiving (the day we drive back home) until January 2 it's almost all I listen to.

This year a few have been bugging me. And no, I'm not talking about the ever annoying Rudolph, Santa Claus, Suzy Snowflake type. Those are just lost causes from the get-go.

"Wonderful Christmastime". This song by Paul McCartney begs the question: just how stupid were the children around Sir Paul when he wrote this? There's a line in the song, "The choir of children sing their song, they've practiced all year long." Um, they practiced a Christmas song all year long? Who does that? I taught 50+ children three Christmas songs in three weeks for our Christmas program. And those kids are not geniuses. (Well, maybe a few of them are, considering my kids are included...)

"I'll Be Home for Christmas (If Only in My Dreams)". I know this song, which has been covered by pretty much anyone who ever released a holiday album, makes some folks nostalgic. But the whole thing is just a gigantic lie or, at the very least, elaborate self delusion. And I don't know about you but I can imagine my Mamaw's response if I were to tell her, "Sure, Mamaw, I'll be home for Christmas...if only in my dreams." I'm not exactly sure what would happen but I suspect it would the equivalent of a slap upside the head.

I'm sure there are more but I have other things to be doing. (Wrapping gifts, cooking, shopping, preparing for a big birthday party tomorrow, etc.) So I'll just go turn on the radio and get back to work.

Oh, and Christmas Radio Stations? While we're at it: The Peanuts Theme Song is not a Christmas song. Never has been, never will be. So stop playing it.


Karabeth said...

"Wonderful Christmastime" is one of my least favorite Christmas songs. I rank it right up there with the one that says, "Last Christmas I gave you my heart. The very next day you gave it away. This year ...blah, blah, blah...I'll give it to somebody special." Oh, give me a break!

And then there's "Christmas Shoes." If that one doesn't give you nausea, I don't know what will. I, for one, don't want to listen to Christmas songs that are so depressing!

Amy said...

I tried making a Pandora Christmas station the other day and got disgusted pretty quickly.

I don't mind the traditional secular songs, but after one after another I finally said, "Can't anybody sing about JESUS?!?" and turned the whole thing off.

Of course, having the hormones and patience of a woman 8 months pregant had nothing to do with it, either. :)

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